Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.