office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
