i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
