I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
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