i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
It's official drugs can't kill me
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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