We're like a lot better than the average bears
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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