Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
