I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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