So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
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I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
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I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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