We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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