Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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