i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
