I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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