Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
