I want to stick my p in your. b.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
