brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
zippers are such a cool invention
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
as a side note pls kill me
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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