im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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