How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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