Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
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