i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
