Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
