dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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