I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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