super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
