Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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