i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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