I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
This house was built for laser tag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize