I cannot find my penis.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
