he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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