We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
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