You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
This house was built for laser tag.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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