I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
