Ambien. No doubt about it.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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