SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
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