Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
