I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
