at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
