maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
