If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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