I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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