I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?