'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
