My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i just google imaged poop.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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