East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
worst night to have a conscience
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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