Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
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