thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Randomize
