I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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