Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.