I think I won the penis lottery.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
