she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
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