i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Walk of Shame today included voting.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
